Take a Stand Against Porn: Which Silently Erodes What We Value Most

Today I am taking a break from my typical topics to bring up a serious concern.  PORN. It’s a worry being voiced by more and more parents I meet with.   I hear incidents with kids as young as kindergarten being exposed unexpectedly to teens working through the snare of internet porn addiction.  Porn is seeping into our homes, churches and schools via digital tools.  And it’s reaching kids at earlier and earlier ages. Porn can pop up unintentionally on a screen or be flashed in front of your child’s face by a peer who enjoys the shock value.

Sadly, a first look, taken out of curiosity, can be the start of an additive pattern.

As parents, and grandparents, wc must not remain silent.

Some parents choose to not speak with their children about porn because of it’s ugly nature. Others are embarrassed to talk about anything to do with sexual activity. Still others ignore it out of personal shame having a past (or present) history of involvement.

No parent however can afford to remain silent. Porn is stealing and destroying our kids. The enemy of our souls comes only to steal and kill and destroy” (John 10:10) and his favorite tool seems to be internet porn.

 Porn is a dark, insidious danger that threatens not just adults and teens (both male and female) but clearly even our children.  “Nothing erodes a person’s faith faster than Internet porn,” states Josh McDowell.

Porn erodes will-power and judgment.  Porn erodes character. Porn silently erodes what we value most: faith and family.

And it results in profound shame, depression and self-contempt for the user.

According to Josh McDowell, who is putting on the Set Free Global Summit this April:

  •  The average age of first exposure is nine years of age.
  • 25% of google searches are for porn.
  • 420,000,000 known pages of porn are available on the web.
  • It is a multi billion dollar worldwide industry.

 To be sure, I am no expert on this topic but want to share a few thoughts from my heart:

  1.  Begin to fill your children’s minds with honoring truths about their bodies and sex at an early age. Purpose to maintain a close, open relationship with them so that you remain the primary influencer of their hearts. A great resource is the set of books called God’s Design for Sex by Stan and Brenna Jones

  2. Keep your eyes open and your ears alert. No child is immune. Maintain wise boundaries and guidelines with regard to their use of digital tools until it’s clear to you that they have grown steadfast in wisdom and self-control.  In the meantime, teach and enforce prudent use of all digital tools and check regularly to be informed about the kind of content they are sending and receiving. A practical, informative resource is Digital Invasion by Dr. Archibald Hart & Dr. Sylvia Frejd.

  3. Your guidelines and boundaries serve to manage their behavior before they are wise enough to control themselves but outside controls do little to change the heart. Jesus changes hearts so regularly teach the beautiful news of the gospel and live your own life by it’s eternal truths. Nothing speaks more powerfully to your kids than the inner quality of your own life. Only Jesus fills the void that sends anyone of us seeking fulfillment elsewhere. The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy but Jesus came so that we may have life and have it abundantly. (John 10:10) When our kids experience intimacy with Christ, what the world offers them will fade in comparison. A powerful resource is John Cusick’s book Surfing for God: Discovering the Divine Desire Beneath Sexual Struggle. Cusick uses real life examples to show how the pursuit of empty pleasure is really a search for our heart’s deepest desire―and the real key to resistance is discovering the joy we truly want.

  4. Finally, let’s purpose to stand up on behalf of our children and not tolerate this in our culture anymore.  Take 8 minutes to listen to Josh Proctor’s power message in his video clip at https://joshproctor.com/mypassion/ The passion of his heart is that “we would tear down the false idol of internet pornography in our culture.”  

  5. Is your own child struggling with porn? Make sure to take a redemptive approach, and not a shame focused one. Shame is already eating away at him or her and merely keeps the dark cycle going. Encourage him to lay his shame at the foot of the cross where he will find a way out of the snare he has fallen into and seek wise Christian counsel from someone who can help him walk out of it.

 

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